hawks vs. gulls
-fledgling soccer team builds stadium on the shores of Lake Ontario
-team recieves excellent support from local fans, despite poor performances on the field
-the local seagulls also develop a strong interest in the goings on at the stadium

sounds like your typical love story to this point, right? Well check out what happens next....

-team employs a hawk named Bitchy to watch over the stadium and keep it clear of seagulls. A real, honest-to-goodness, 4-foot wingspan, if you fly in here I'm seriously going to kill and eat you, carnivorous raptor.

Just another reason why soccer is the greatest game in the world.